Life As We Know It: fear

Saturday, November 5, 2011

How Times Change

I received an email from one of my readers today, and it brought me back to the time right after we got Kennedy's diagnosis. I can honestly say, along with her heart surgery, this was one of the hardest times in my life. A true roller coaster of emotions. Nothing but love for my sweet baby girl, but a fear of what was ahead. What her life would be like, what our lives would be like. How would I raise a special needs child. I had no idea what I was doing, and I was scared.

That was eight and a half months ago. I wish I knew how rewarding it would be. I wish I knew how wonderful it would turn out to be. And more than anything, I wish I had known just how normal life would be. I didn't have anyone to tell me these things. I felt scared and alone. Little by little, I found people to talk to. People that understood. They all told me it would be like this, but at the time, I just couldn't imagine. Down syndrome felt like the center of my universe. It felt like it would rule our lives.

That's not the case at all. There are days that I don't even think about Down syndrome. As you've probably seen, a lot of my blog posts lately have been pretty boring and routine. We have a *normal* life. What is normal anyway? We might have a few extra appointments, and Kennedy may be a little smaller and less mobile than other babies her age. But, she may also be a little bigger than some babies her age. And honestly, I kind of like being able to leave her in one place, and know she can't go far.

Our lives are pretty routine. We face the same challenges any other parents face. Sure we have a few extra challenges, but who doesn't? Ours are just a little different. Today's challenge was when Kennedy decided to poop in the tub. And then on the floor. And then she peed all over the bathroom. I KNOW I'm not the first parent to have to deal with that. And I'm pretty sure it's not just parents of kids with Down syndrome.

I started this blog almost 6 months ago. Partially to keep friends and family updated, and partially with the hope of *someday* helping others through this journey. I never imagined that I would be helping others so early on in my journey. Lately I find myself giving out my email address or my phone number more and more. This week alone I've gotten two emails and a phone call. It makes me feel good to know that others are benefiting from our experience. I feel like I've reached a new point in this journey.

I'll stop rambling now. I know you aren't used to me having something to say. Here's some cute pictures of Kennedy.

Nom nom nom...pancakes. Too bad mommy won't let me have syrup.