Reminiscing

As we settle into life as a family of four, it brings back so many memories of what life was like nearly 18 months ago when Kennedy was born.  It's hard to believe that my little princess will be 18 months old in just a few days.  It doesn't seem possible.  I was fortunate to have my amazing doula here helping out yesterday, since I'm not supposed to be lifting Kennedy yet.  We watched the slideshow of Caleb's birth, and then scrolled through photos of Kennedy's birth.  Two of the best days of my life.  Looking back at both, Angie and I cried through each one.  But the memories of Kennedy's birth brought more tears.  I couldn't help but realize how scared I looked in the photos after the midwife told me that she suspected Down syndrome.  I felt guilty because I wasn't smiling in those photos.  I truly had a look of fear in all of the remaining photos, followed by photos of Kennedy in the NICU.  It was one of the happiest days of our lives, but also one of the most scary.  I still have regrets over how I felt that day and I wish that I had known just how amazing things would end up.  When I look at Kennedy now, I just can't believe what a little girl she's turning into.  Seeing her in the slideshow of Caleb's birth compared to the photos of the day she was born, it really hit me just how far we've come in what feels like such a short time.  We made it through a shocking diagnosis, feeding struggles, open heart surgery, and our little girl is happy and healthy.  All of those things, that I once felt like I couldn't survive, feel like a distant memory.  Kennedy's not a baby anymore, she's truly a toddler - though she will always be my baby girl. 

It brings tears of happiness to see her as a big sister.  She's getting better every day at being gentle with Caleb and even gives him kisses with out our prompting.  When she woke up this morning she stood up on the bed, peering over my legs to see what her brother was up to.  As much as I love the snuggly newborn phase, and I know it doesn't last long, I'm very excited to see their relationship get stronger as Caleb gets a little older and they are able to play together. 

Hey blog reading people!

 

Here brother, let me fix your blanket for you.

Kennedy had a great time playing with her cousins last weekend.

 Kennedy has been on what we call summer vacation from therapy.  Her therapists have still been coming, but she's had a bit of a break from the normal routine with mommy.  Here she practices walking with Grandma.

I've got this walking thing - I can even do it against a wall.

(Since this photo she's discovered banging things on the wall.) 

 It's ok Caleb, don't cry.

I'll hold your hand.  I promise, Mommy is coming as soon as she gets my snack.

Look at the sheep Caleb, these are my old friends.